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Post by Skyborn on May 14, 2009 15:41:20 GMT -5
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Post by DoveAlexa on May 14, 2009 17:37:07 GMT -5
Oh god, laughing so hard I'm crying at some of this.
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Post by DoveAlexa on May 14, 2009 18:10:43 GMT -5
Double posting for GLORY!
"(847): i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out."
Laughed till I cried and wheezed.
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Post by Skyborn on May 15, 2009 9:57:17 GMT -5
(954): You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
(805): she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
(207): I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
(301): i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
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Post by Skyborn on May 15, 2009 10:21:31 GMT -5
(781): i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention. (1-781): didn't that happen to you last weekend? (781): shut up.
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(917): I cockslap morals
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(330): So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
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(281): How do you jack off and text at the same time? (1-281): On my iPhone they have an app for that
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Post by aacevedo on May 15, 2009 11:30:46 GMT -5
Looks promising.I'll check it this aftenoon
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Post by Skyborn on May 15, 2009 12:37:30 GMT -5
I was quite literally in tears I was laughing so hard...
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Post by aacevedo on May 15, 2009 14:48:11 GMT -5
(203): How did you manage that? (860): Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis (203): lol... jersey girls rock 10/10 This one is so sad... (408): hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over (650): nah, i'm gonna grab some food 10/10
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Post by heroshade on May 15, 2009 18:56:18 GMT -5
I like this one
(810) They still out there making out on the couch?? (901) Yeah. (810) We need to get them out of here. (901) I'll go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife.
And
(512): I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
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zyrokin
Forumfall Refugee
Forumfall #17
Posts: 9
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Post by zyrokin on May 15, 2009 20:07:30 GMT -5
Awesome site, hilarious shit.
This one made me crack up. (480): hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
oh just found this one, soooo wrong. but hilarious (586): theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
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Post by heroshade on May 16, 2009 23:44:58 GMT -5
(386): her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
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Post by tallefred on May 20, 2009 19:40:16 GMT -5
I challenge one of you to beat this one:
(314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
><
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Post by heroshade on May 20, 2009 21:00:19 GMT -5
I challenge one of you to beat this one: (314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present. >< (773): I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
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Post by tallefred on May 20, 2009 21:55:23 GMT -5
I challenge one of you to beat this one: (314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present. >< (773): I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you. Not nearly as bad. Here's another nice one: (404): Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs. (1-404): Two? (404): Two.
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Post by DoveAlexa on May 20, 2009 22:43:02 GMT -5
Oh wow poor guy
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